Today’s challenges

Feeling defeated……Does anyone else feel that way? The reality is finally setting in. As I finish reading my son’s IEP report to transition him into kindergarten, I can’t help but feel defeated, sad, worried, discouraged, and most of all hopeless. Reading that your child is severely delayed in everything and the amount of support he will need is astronomical is unreal. I knew that he had developmental delays, but never in my mind did I think of it as extremely severe. To say in all the categories that the school district have evaluated him in, he scored either severely low or extremely low, and at this point there’s no difference between the two. A million things are racing through my mind right now and I can’t sleep, and I feel like I can’t breathe. And now I’m wondering to myself, can I even help my son? I don’t know what most parents with neurotypical kids want for their children’s future, but for a mom like me who has a child on the spectrum, all I want for him is to be ok in the future. So what doe that mean? I don’t need my son to obtain any fancy degrees, land any fancy jobs with fancy titles, I just want him to be able to hold down a job he may like, have a family is he wants to, just be able to be live his life independently without help. Is that too much to ask? Can I get him there? These questions run around like circles in my head everyday. Somedays, I feel great and I think I can do it but on days like this I am losing my mind and losing hope. So I just want to know, is someone out there feeling like this? Would love to hear and read your thoughts.

Sincerely- overly worried mom

Responses

  1. zdfinn Avatar

    I am sorry you are suffering as you are and although I come from a different perspective – having been a mediator between parents, schools and local authorities in the UK for over 20 years – I just wanted to say that the beauty of these children was often overlooked because of their seeming failures in some aspects of life.

    Often I felt the education system failed them more than they failed it. Their needs were different, as are their skills and they need patience, love and understanding to develop in their diverse and unique ways. I appreciate that education systems seek to impose universal standards and measurable goals, but not all children thrive the best in classrooms, with all the noise and bustle of their peers all being regimented.

    Each child is unique and I understand that places an impossible burden on providers, but they all teach us something. Primarily patience, unconditional love, how we all have our part to play in this complex world, and that and we each have a value. I am sure your child will find a way to shine in this world with you beside them. They will be your teacher too, if you let them and trust in them.

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  2. thechristiantechnerd Avatar

    Amazing work on your first post! It’s polished, engaging, and full of personality. I already know readers are going to appreciate and enjoy your voice. Keep going strong!

    Liked by 1 person

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